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Arguments 'normal' in coupledom
30 July 2008
Having an argument with your spouse or partner does not mean you love them any less, a relationship expert says.
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Arguments are part of the territory of being in a committed relationship and do not signal disaster.
According to a survey by Relationship Services, 78 per cent of couples have some kind of ongoing disagreement.
Hilary Smith, from the service, said: "Even in the happiest, longest-lasting of relationships, couples disagree. And most people do learn to deal with them."
The survey of more than 1,500 people in long-term relationships found money was the biggest cause of arguments for couples, with four out of ten having blazing rows about their finances.
Next in line were work pressures, followed by a lack of time, housework and sex life.
The survey found that – not contrary to stereotype – men feel that women nag too much, while women feel that their men do not listen.
Ms Smith said: "We were not surprised that the survey found a difference between men and women around communication.
"When counsellors hear the phrases 'nagging' or 'not listening', we know there is a communication issue in the relationship to work on."
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