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Qualities That Women Find Attractive In Divorced Men
3 February 2012
“If you’ve been married, you know how good it feels to be someone’s special person — even if it didn’t last long— and are likely to want to experience that again," says Denise Knowles, a relationship counselor.
She adds: "Divorcees are often more open to settling down than those who have never been in committed relationships, which may be what increases their appeal to women when their biological clocks start ticking. "
According to Denise divorced men have a clearer idea of what they want and don’t want from a relationship and may make them more willing to talk about it, which can be appealing on a date. .
Within three months of 41 year old Rachel Allen meeting 40 year old divorcee Mike Rocher, she moved into his home in Grays, Essex. She and Mike, connected over a shared love of keeping fit, a teetotal lifestyle and the fact each of them has an 11-year-old son.
Rachel says ‘With a divorced man he doesn’t shy away from commitment, and men who have been through a break-up are keener to make future relationships work. They crave love and affection whereas single men who have never been off the dating scene take it for granted.’
"In my experience, a man only becomes a real man when he’s a father and has been through a bit of heartache, such as divorce, " adds Rachel.
"Mike is good-looking, muscular, hard-working and very loving, and I’m more interested in our future together than I am in his relationship history."
Dr Alistair Ross, a chartered psychologist specializing in inter-personal relationships at London’s King’s College, says that with divorce rates rising, women are looking to settle down with partners in their 30s and beyond and are having to consider divorcees because there are many more of them about.
Dr Ross believes: "On the plus side these men already understand what it is to set up homes and have joint bank accounts, whereas there are many men in their 30s nowadays who have never known responsibility. To a woman thinking of settling down and maybe having kids, a divorcee might seem like a better bet."
Denise Knowles adds a note of caution: "Divorced men are only a good bet if they have carefully considered the reasons their marriages failed. Better still are those divorcees who have worked out ways in which they might have avoided the divorce courts," finally adding. "They’re the ones who can really bring experience to a new relationship."
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