This is Andy your friendly neighbourhood Managing Director with a fantastic job opportunity from Mary Balfour who was co-founder of this very Loveandfriends site 13 years ago. Mary still runs
Cohabiting has become the norm - 80 per cent of us cohabit before marrying. Since 2001, the number of cohabiting couples in the UK has risen dramatically from 2.1 million to 2.9 million.
Here''s some advice on MANAGING, HIDING and EXPIRING Mutual Matches ...
HIDING Mutual Matches
If you press the X at the top right hand corner of a profile in your Mutual Match list this will HIDE the member in your Mutual Match list. This does not change their Tag status but it does let you manage your list so you can just focus on people you are currently actively interested in.
If you have been on the site for 3 months and have say 70 Mutual Matches you may want to only look at the 15 you are *currently* interested in.
People who you have already emailed/met - it is often better to HIDE these so you just have active people on your Mutual Match list.
The other member does not know they have been hidden.
EXPIRING Mutual Matches
Red Background on Mutual Match page = the mutual match has expired
Once a mutual match has been made if cannot be ''Un-made''. This would cause great confusion with members randomly disappearing from Mutual Match lists. However, the Mutual Match can be ''Expired''. If you re-tag an existing Mutual Match member as a ''NO'' then we consider the match ''Expired'' and this will show on the other member''s Mutual Match list as your profile displayed with a red background.
Expiry also occurs when the member deletes their profile or goes ''On Hold''. These profiles would also display in your Mutual Match list with a red background. Essentially red background = member probably no longer available.
Typically if a Mutual Match is made but you don''t bother to contact the member for a couple weeks when they''re expecting a reply from you - they may choose to expire the match. The reason for this is that people often want to keep their Mutual Match list as members they are *actively* interested in.
Also we do get people who join the site and don''t realise how popular they will be when they start tagging people. They end up generating more Mutual Matches than they expected and are a bit ''inundated''. They then may choose to ''Expire'' some of these matches as they can''t cope with replying to emails from too many people. Yes we know this can be a bit disappointing to find yourself ''Expired'' - but C''est la vie.
So, if you see a member you like / want to contact who is showing as red/expired in your Mutual Match list what is the upshot? Well the #1 lesson would be that you should have contacted this member EARLIER - before they expired you. Either they''ve got fed up waiting for you to contact them OR they''ve been Mutual Matched with other more good looking / interesting / keen members and so you''ve been side-lined.
You can of course still message them (as long as they have not deleted) - but you most probably have some ground to make up - so your email better be witty and charming! ;-)
SUMMARY
So basically you can choose to EXPIRE (by tagging the member as a ''No'') or HIDE (by clicking the X) Mutual Matches. If you EXPIRE them the other member will know they have been expired. If you HIDE them - they have no idea.